Who You Gonna Call? Stress Busters!

As we approach the next fifty plus days and begin the mad dash to Thanksgiving and Christmas, let's focus on maintaining some sanity in our lives and keeping the stress to a minimum.  Easier said than done, right?  Personally, I'm not sure why everyone is so worked up when entertaining during the holidays.  It's generally family only and if you can't be comfortable with your family, who can you be comfortable with?  Well, perhaps for some a trip to the dentist for a root canal might be more comfortable than spending the day with family, but you get the drift.

Whatever your schedule, it's just that - a schedule.  So mark it on your calendars.  I have found that I have always bitten off more than I could chew, but if you can visualize everything you need to do or places you have to go, you can see right away that there aren't enough hours in the day to do everything right and you must choose what's most important and learn to say no to a few invitations.

Learn to organize when you're hosting the meal.  I write out everything that needs to be done from the biggest task such as moving furniture or having the carpets cleaned to the most minute task of making ice.  Once the list is made, I then make a timeline of when each item needs to be accomplished.  This way, you don't wake up on the day of the party and realize there's a stain in the middle of your one and only tablecloth.

Keep it simple.  Attempt recipes that don't require Martha Stewart to be at your side.  I've learned to not panic.  At my bridal shower, I remember the ladies who made the dessert and when the desserts came out of the oven they hadn't quite set up and sort of crumbled on the plates.  They just scooped it up and added some ice cream and it was a sort of instant cobbler.  No one was the wiser and the dessert was a hit. 

Worse case scenario, learn to laugh.  My mother never lived down the time when, as a new bride, she accidentally coated the chicken in powdered sugar instead of flour.  It made for a great family story that was told for years.

Work in some time for yourself.  A half hour with your favorite book, a mid-afternoon nap, a bubble bath at the end of the evening with some candles before the day of the big event.  You are going to be the hostess.  Your guests, not your meal, not your decorations, not everything being perfect, are what is most important.  Only Norman Rockwell had the perfect Thanksgiving and that's because he painted it. 

Your guests should feel comfortable.  Don't force them to eat the appetisers and then yell when they've eaten too many and won't have room for the dinner.  If they're comfortable sitting after dinner and not helping with the dishes, well, you can sit at their house when the dishes are being washed at the next holiday.  If they are the type who want to do your dishes, but you're tired and would just prefer to sit and enjoy your company, go sit with your company and let them wash.  Don't feel guilty.

If you always host a particular holiday and are beginning to feel like you're being taken advantage of, get creative with doling out the duties.  A friend of mine has a job jar and all the kids had to draw a task from it.  It might be setting the table, filling the water glasses, helping with the dishes, etc.  At the beginning, they all grumbled, but over the years it became a way to lighten the load for the hostess plus a bonding experience as everyone worked side by side.

So let's summarize:

1. Learn to say no
2. Make a schedule
3. Organize
4. Keep it simple
5. Laugh
6. Make time for yourself
7. Get creative
8. Enjoy!

You've worked hard for many days and deserve to enjoy this moment. Isn't that why we gather together in the first place?